My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Randomize