the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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