oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
