I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
