Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
