was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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