everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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