I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
