just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
