well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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