shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
