Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
