Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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