Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I'm experimenting with sincerity
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
