I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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