i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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