Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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