You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
