Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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