your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Randomize