Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize