Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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