But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
