new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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