I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
