what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
