you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
