On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize