I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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