That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
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His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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