Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
