my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
where are my pants?
in the oven.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Pooping to opera.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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