i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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