Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
