problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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