You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
