i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize