I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
