i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
