He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
