did you get engaged???
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize