You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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