Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
