Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
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he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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