you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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