I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
