I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I party with great urgency now.
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