They should really pass out barf bags in church
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I can't put those talents on a resume
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
