I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
