Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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